lardass

— It was soon realized that there werenąt^([sic]) enough creaky knees, arthritic hips and aching backs outside of the sunbelt to support carts so they went after the lardass trade. And when they realized that there were not sufficient numbers of creaky knees, arthritic hips, aching backs and lardasses, they targeted the morally crippled. And when they saw that creaky knees, arthritic hips, aching backs, lardasses and the morally crippled didnąt^([sic]) do it for them, they finally made carts mandatory for everyone.